Tag Archives: resonate

Every Messy Draft is Progress

Writing your first book is hard. Not hard in a, you might not make it way, hard in a personal growth way. It stretches you. It teaches you. It invites you to show up, over and over again, even when it’s messy or unclear. That’s something to be proud of. There’s no point in looking back with regret and wishing you did it differently.

Your first draft won’t be perfect. Your tenth might not be either. But every version, every attempt, every quiet moment you spend trying to get the words right is part of the journey. Those messy drafts, the constant second-guessing, the moments where your confidence disappears completely? That’s all normal. It’s part of the process. Every author you admire has been exactly where you are. In fact, many of them have been there with every single book they write.

Every stumble, every deleted page, every, What am I even doing? moment is completely normal. In fact, it’s to be expected. That’s how writing works. That’s how writers are made. You’re not off track, you’re exactly where you should be.

Now’s the time to regroup. Pause. Take a breath. Look at how far you’ve already come. You’ve built something. Maybe it’s a little crooked. Maybe it needs a stronger foundation or a fresh coat of paint. That’s okay. Now you get to revise, refine, reimagine, and craft your book.

You have tools now. You’ve got feedback, insights, ideas. You’ve got instincts that are sharper than they were before. Trust them. Go back to your manuscript with a clear heart and look at it with fresh eyes. Read every line not with judgment, but with curiosity. Ask yourself, “How can this be even truer?” Not more polished. Not more literary. Just more you.

Ask yourself not, “Is this perfect?” but “Is this true to the heart of what I’m trying to say?”  Every line doesn’t need to sparkle, it just needs to work. You don’t need to impress anyone. Aim for honesty, clarity, and connection. You just need to finish what you started, in your own voice, in your own way.

Because this isn’t just about finishing a book. It’s about becoming a writer.

And becoming a writer means learning how to stay the course. How to bounce back. How to work through uncertainty. Writing a book is more than just telling a story. It’s about learning how to show up even when it’s hard. It means trusting that every draft matters, even the messy ones. It means falling down and getting back up, again and again. It means embracing the long game, and celebrating the small wins along the way. So if you’re doing that? Then let me be clear, you already are a writer—building something bold, one brave word at a time.

The Long Game

For much of my life, I shrouded myself in toughness and wrapped myself in a blanket of looking like I knew what I was doing, which is what overachievers do. I followed all sorts of spiritual healers until I realised that there are no quick fixes for the human condition. We are complex, nuanced, organic creatures who carry the stories and the trauma of the generations who came before us. Being human is the long game, nothing quick about it.

We are born and remain physically vulnerable longer than any other species on the planet. Wishing we could just snap out of painful experiences and be happy and upbeat only brings more suffering. Pain calls for clear, direct, open presence: this is listening to and releasing the part of the experience that is not ours and feeling the raw, wild part that belongs to us. This is what’s real; hiding, avoiding, trying to remain positive is more painful and dishonest. This is where lies and myths take hold.

What if you brought deep presence into your feelings of pain, anxiety, grief or discomfort? What if staying present was the way through when sitting in the mud of emotional turmoil?

So why all the quick fix healing dogma? Fix your mind-set in 30 days. Trauma healing in 90 days. Less wrinkles in 6 weeks. New body in 60 days. Everything convenient and fast, almost instant.

Now is the time to draw on your resilience. Knowing that, not only can you survive the painful and hard aspects of being alive, but your resilient spirit ensures that you thrive in every moment — painful or not.

We’re built to bounce back naturally from difficult situations. The human condition is incredibly robust. What keeps us from this durability is believing that we’re not naturally resilient.

Some of us come from backgrounds where we’ve been taught to believe we are weak and fragile and need looking after.  We’re not. Allowing time and space is required to be fully human.  Don’t hurry.  Use the tools and skills that resonate with you. Don’t follow someone else’s dogma. As you are unique, the map for your healing and life is also unique.

This blog was drawn from The Book of Hope – Antidote for Anxiety.

Link to my buy books page:  http://www.vickibennett.com.au/orders.html

 

 

 

 

Expectations


Letting go of expectations a tricky one to understand. How can we have goals but let go of our expectations of the goal? Being a goal setter and a visualiser since my teens, I found the difference lies in detaching from a particular outcome.

Continue reading Expectations